I've been a subscriber to Private Eye for nearly 30 years and a reader for longer. Their latest cover is so good I post it here in case anyone misses it!
I have to say that I am astounded at the size of Sir Fred's pension, it most certainly is an obscene amount. Having said that, someone somewhere has been stupid enough to sanction it without any regard to his performance or lack of. Fills you full of confidence, doesn't it?
I am sorry you find this so amusing. The sight of a fine captain of industry having to resort to shooting rabbits to fill his Sunday lunch table fills me with sadness.
Bruin: I heard a report recently proving that the more unequal a society, the more broken it is. We are very unequal whereas Scandinavian Countries and Japan are not.
Vicus: The words "Captain" and "Industry" don't sit well on Sir Fred's Shoulders. The word "Wanker" does.
Dave: I suspect Fred's obscene pension could provide for several hundred Daves.
Uh-huh. Oh dear. In view of your reply to dear old Kaz am I going to have to change my name if I drop in, Rog? Should I adopt a pseudonym? Please advise.
WV: matou (colloquial French for e.g. a stud, a heavy, someone like Sébastian Chabal only more virile) Very flattered.
14 comments:
Why doesn't he do us all a favour and turn it on himself?
I have to say that I am astounded at the size of Sir Fred's pension, it most certainly is an obscene amount. Having said that, someone somewhere has been stupid enough to sanction it without any regard to his performance or lack of. Fills you full of confidence, doesn't it?
I am sorry you find this so amusing. The sight of a fine captain of industry having to resort to shooting rabbits to fill his Sunday lunch table fills me with sadness.
All those who retire early on a full pension should be taken out, lined up against the wall and sho-
Hang on a minute.
Forget I spoke.
It just goes to prove the inequality inherent in the system. I've been crap at everything my whole life and I'm still broke. What did I do wrong?
Geoff: If I were the gun I'd say "You're Fired!".
Bruin: I heard a report recently proving that the more unequal a society, the more broken it is. We are very unequal whereas Scandinavian Countries and Japan are not.
Vicus: The words "Captain" and "Industry" don't sit well on Sir Fred's Shoulders. The word "Wanker" does.
Dave: I suspect Fred's obscene pension could provide for several hundred Daves.
Richard: Good point. Lets declare a Fatcatwah!
The annoying thing is that his pension is legal!!
Apart from the obvious, he should be shot for his appalling dress sense.
Hold on a sec - I'll do it myself.
John: He won't be showing his beaming face around anytime soon though.
Kaz: He thinks he looks like someone with a double-barrelled surname. We all need a good villain to blame everything on - he'll do for the moment.
What sort of idiot goes for a day's shooting in the country wearing slip-on shoes?
Quite obviously a member of the nouveaux riche.
Uh-huh. Oh dear. In view of your reply to dear old Kaz am I going to have to change my name if I drop in, Rog? Should I adopt a pseudonym? Please advise.
WV: matou (colloquial French for e.g. a stud, a heavy, someone like Sébastian Chabal only more virile)
Very flattered.
Malc: He shot himself in the foot there!
Dott: How come nouvelle cuisine stands for SMALL portions?
Christopher: I was thinking of double barrelled names like Purdy. Not a Matou like you!
The only decent thing to come out of this is that at least he won't be able to live off the interest because there soon won't be any.
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