So I had an idea.
What about recycling all that book learning for the modern World? What about applying some of that hard earned scientific knowledge to current day social situations? There's a best selling book here so I baggsy this idea first, although if you want to contribute ideas they will be extensively acknowledged in 7pt Times Footnotes at the back.
OK, here's my first application of old Science to New Society. Newton's Law of Cooling.
Newton's Law of Cooling states that the rate of change of the temperature of an object is proportional to the difference between its own temperature and the ambient temperature (i.e. the temperature of its surroundings). That is to say the higher the differential, the faster the rate of cooling.
Imagine you are Brad Pitt, one of the coolest people on the planet, attending a convention of Red Dwarf devotees in Droitwich one December, one of the least cool situations he could find himself in. The rate at which he will lose his credibility and "cool" will be extremely fast due to the vast discrepancy between himself and his surroundings. Leonard Cohen being interviewed by Steve Wright's Posse would be a similar sharp gradient of cooling.
Next week - Boyles Law applied to Jeremy Clarkson.