Tuesday, 14 February 2012

Rubbish Analogies

Leading the Pedant's Revolt (or was that Which Tyler?) I heard somebody the other day saying they were "learning via Osmosis".

Now Osmosis, as we all learnt at school, is the tendency of a fluid, usually water, to pass through a semipermeable membrane into a solution where the solvent concentration is higher, thus equalizing the concentrations of materials on either side of the membrane. The direction of travel is from the weaker to the stronger and like school dinners, potatoes are very often involved.

Thus, taking in knowledge via Osmosis implies that the learner has the stronger concentration of knowledge already, which defeats the entire analogy. Perhaps it's called "analogy" because it's the art of talking out of one's bottom. I imagine some super-pedant or pedant-monitor will shortly turn up to tell me it's a metaphor.

Our Tibetan Terrier has a wonderfully comfortable basket, almost like a Moses basket. He takes in things by Oz-Moses but don't go anywhere near his analogies.


Scarlet Blue said...

I think I will stick with your version of Oz-moses. It doesn't hurt my head so much.

Christopher said...

Yes. A fundamental analysis.

You could revolutionise education by inventing osmotic suppositories.

You read it here first.

Macy said...

I believe you'll find it was the Pedants' Revolt, Rog.

No, it's OK. You're welcome.

Martin said...

Top tip. Stand back from anyone who talks out of their bottom. They may well need to clear their throat, first.

Rog said...

Scarlet: You've got a semipermeable memory!

Christopher: You've come round here to scatter logic haven't you?

Macy: I can only see one Pedant from where I'm standing.

Martin: I'll fetch my blogroll,

Z said...

Having read your final sentence, Rog, I'm laughing so much that I can say nothing more. Splendid.

Gabrielle Bryden said...


Soaring said...

What's a metaphor?
It's all a load of bolism.

broken biro said...

"analogy" = the art of talking out of one's bottom

Excellent. I may have to steal that.
It will go down in the annals.

Pat said...

Oh is that what the Americans mean by 'suck it up? I did wonder.
These flippin' W.V.s need three D eyes.

mig bardsley said...

His analogies are safe from me. I usually don't understand them anyway.